I usually eat lunch with the same six people from work. I recently regaled them with the story of my inordinate fear and loathing of all things blimp. I even told them about the most menacing blimp ever – spotted over Camden Yards on September 1, 2001. This sinister blimp not only ruined the ballgame for me, but came darn close to ruining my thirtieth birthday as well. Fortunately, there were no blimps in sight the day prior or a wedding might have lost a guest at an early hour. My supervisor, part of the lunch crew, thought this irrational behavior on my part was completely hilarious. She was sure that I alone suffered from this plight, but she forwarded me a link that diagnoses my condition. So, in case you also fear blimps or are just plain bored…
Eat My Peashoot
Eat My Peashoot 
First, from the article: “If you have a phobia of large objects or animals, it is important to seek treatment right away.” Second: You have to admit that this phobia lends itself to all sorts of phallic jokes…Freud would have had a heyday with you on this one!
A phobia of large objects??? Dare you say, sir…what are you implying? Can we argue the 1st Amendment again? Damn…